Friday, August 7, 2009
(משוגע אויף טויזענט (ג
what a novel idea!
An anonymous reader commenting to Circus Tent: (2) האלבע ארבעט
Please bring 'em on fast and furious! Don't let up until you have expended all ammunition regarding this issue of the "Queen Elizabeth" standard of living we have been forced into by the "heimishe" chandelier -> breakfront -> leather couch -> black SUV -> matching clothing -> beheime fleish -> hoieche shtraamell mit a kroin -> winterized summer home -> breite kiddish -> silver vase -> vort, barmitzvah, sheva brooches, shloishim seedeh, fres-fests w/props and party planner -> Ateres Buckingham Palace wedding hall crowd. The list is endless... Not to mention the "religiously" oriented obsessive spending. The grossly bloated and bepatchkete 925 oversized Menoires, esrig pishkes, megille halters, zalts meistlech, napkin holders, besuumem pishkes, atooores (Shabbes, in far di vochentug) alles lekuved Shabbes!!! The echt leiderne antique covered siddeeerem, machzoirem, ketoires on klaf , chuusen shassen, tzenerenas, seleeches, (look out for the new leather kinnus) All in the name of the almighty G-d. Forget about the housing issue including home furniture, lighting, staircases, doors, decarative hardware and seforim shranks. I don't even know where to start.
Are BP, CH, KJ, Lkwd and Willy "America?"
Regarding the prices on goods and services within the heimishe community; Firstly, given the above mentioned "breite" standard of living, every shop owner or fachman starts out with the premise that you need to become rich from selling anything, otherwise there is no point in trying, no such thing as trying to "make an average living". So he needs to milk the consumer to the max. Whether it's a jewelry store or a shoe store, dress shop or seforim store, hat store or dry goods, a car dealer or electronics, the mikveh yid or the plumber, kid's tutor or mechanic etc. etc. aleh derfen shein ferdeenen. Forget about the quality of the product, or the reliability of the services, not to mention friendly courteous service; those are non-issues in competition the hatzloche depends on the cutthroat and nasty "take it or leave it" "ich hub besers voos tzi teen" attitude you convey to your fellow Yid. Ver ret noch when dealing with a temimes'digeh mother of ten whose husband struggles just to pay the mortgage - just ignore her or sell her the seconds, "tax free".
Out of the coffee rooms!
There are many items which without which it's poshut impossible to be Jewish. For instance: Black velvet/felt hats - in the rain, leather dress shoes in the snow, 100% polyester (zaadeneh) beckishes in the hot summer, Tall shtreimlech to dance at hakoofes, Custom Sheitlach (for the less-frum) when taking the baby to the doctor r"l, designer hats (for the echt frimme) when going to the fish store, diamond earrings when going to the dentist and last but not least Italian shoes when taking the kids to the hair dresser. Or food: overnight kigel, matyash herring by the .001 oz, or 4.5 oz. containers of Arbes, 98% Mayonnaise - egg, tuna, dill, olive, spinach, whitefish and lox dips, Express tuna-less sandwiches, zero trans fat rugelach (best in the entire country), overstuffed pastrami flavored filling sandwiches, and yes, LIGHT grape juice. Hello! Any accountability out there? Der oilem is hingerig! Royal Shoes, Malchus Suits, Kesser Hats, Queen's Boutique. Oh! I forgot Royal Linen, Royal Furniture, Royal Kitchens, Royal Doors, etc. The obsession with these types of names says alot about the mentality of the consumer. We have gone totally crazy, and I shudder when thinking what will need to happen in order to bring us back to a sane, logical, economically-sound way of life. PLEASE SOUND THE ALARM! KEEP THIS ISSUE ON THE FRONT BURNER UNTIL EVERYONE COMES TO THEIR SENSES!
May everyone be gebentched mit asach parnooseh bekooved.
P.S I am out of breath, as you can tell.