Wednesday, March 4, 2009
It seems like I'm part of the problem. Why? because I offer no solutions. Because I don't scream "kill the molesters" from the rooftops. Because I won't post the "suicide letter" that the kid Finkelstein from Lakewood who OD'd on heroin wrote a few weeks ago. Because after that kid another one of the Cows took his own life two days ago. It's almost as if they sit around and wait for it to happen so that they can point fingers again. We're all molesters in their books. I ask them what they want us to do, but they have no answers. No solutions from the stoned ones. All they can do is tell me to write about it. What they don't understand is that we don't revel in revealing shmutz like some other sites, so we find it very difficult to write about these very sensitive topics. That's not to say that we care any less or that we want to sweep it under the carpet. The cows write me nasty messages and wish the worst things on me and my children. I don't take their drug-induced wishes very seriously, but I do care about them, they are our brothers, we need to help them. If only they'd wanna be helped....
What I find is that they like to live in both worlds. They want the attention from the frummies, they want us never to judge them, to accept them, and never to make them feel uncomfortable, c"v. We need to let them have their "good times," and then, when they get a little tired of all that "fun," to have a table decked in white with Challahs and wine waiting for them. Why? because. Just "because." Otherwise we're all Nazis. After all, we're the ones that made them into what they became, so we need to make them all better too. What can I say? I would feel a bit used if that were to happen to me. If I had a child or friend that acted that way, after a while I'd get a little tired of his act and demand some sort of consistency from him or her. Either you behave in a way that leaves us somewhat comfortable, or don't expect only love and open arms from us. It's human nature; give and take. If you don't pitch in don't expect to get something for your non-efforts. Nobody likes a louse, a moocher, a do-nothing. In any culture.
Now, if we're to believe this kid Finkelstein he was molested as a child. That's what he seems to write in his "suicide note." I don't claim to know what it's like, nor do I judge him for what he did. But my G-d, if this is the case now, if every kid that goes off the derech will now claim that he was abused as a child and will eventually take his own life, can we sit idly by and do nothing? On the other hand; I would assume that most of these kids wouldn't want well-meaning strangers approaching them on the street, asking them if they were hurt as a child, and offering counseling, right? So what do they want? If they know who did it to them, let them go and tell the authorities. Work to extend the SOL for these crimes. Do what must be done. There are Rabbonim out there who are willing and able to help. The subject is becoming less and less taboo by the day. But please, my dear cows, don't stick to your drugs and your other vices and expect help if you won't allow yourselves to be helped. Don't accuse us of being "murderers" and then want help and love from us. We have feelings too. Nobody likes to have his offers for help be rejected time and time again. After a while we just stop helping.