Monday, May 7, 2007

אבי נישט פון אונזערע


(Valach getting a Kos Shel Eliyohu)

It hurts to say this; but we in Yiddishkeit have become all about groups, and we look out for our own. Just barely at that. Every time I see an article about frum dropouts I cringe when I read about the Lubavitcher kids in the group, and pray that there are none. I understand it's selfish of me, but never did I say I was without faults. Judaism isn't judged as a whole anymore, but as small to large groups accomplishing for themselves, and producing according to their guidelines. We could care less about the Jewish community as a whole, and we aren't affected by stories that happen in other communities. Sad but true. This came to mind when I read in HydePark and on mentalblog.com about this Chozer BiShe'elah - Dovid Valach - who won the Sundance Film Festival award for best something or other film.

Valach comes from a prestigious Yerushalmi family - one of anywhere from 17 to 22 kids - who freid out at 25 and became a filmmaker. He was supposedly a Metzuyon at Ponovezh (probably not) who realized that this was not the life for him. So he went on to making films about frum Jews, and that always works in Israel. The novelty here is that so warmly accepted by the non-Jewish community as well. It tells the story of a father and son who doon't get along very well, since the father's approach to raising him is seen as excessive by the son. The situation only gets worse when the family travels to the dead sea for summer vacation, and tragedy befalls them when their son, the same son drowns. They then need to deal with their faith and the questions that now have, as well as with their grief.

So what comes to mind is abi er iz nisht fun unzere, at least he's somebody else's problem. At least he's the result of a different system, and of a group we don't emulate. Let them be busy with him. At least he's not the result of our own shortcomings, and at least we don't need to reflect some more on the inadequacies of our educational system and act upon them. We get to breath easy until the next scandal or story breaks. We'll cross that bridge when we get there. It's like this every time there's an accident or a terrorist attack, or a monetary scandal in the news: !א היימישע? ניין? ברוך השם I feel like this approach in life makes me more like the community that you all want me to return to, the Klal Yisroel. I hope you appreciate this sentiment......

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

A car crash!?

The family inside all died?!

Are they "fun unzere?"

No?

Phew - B"H.

Anonymous said...

Right on Tzig. I think in our larger charadi world, it is easier to keep only to 'our own', which devalues any frum yid who is not 100% like us.

Lucky Wolf said...

Once the Rebbe asked a certain other Rebbe that visited him what is being done about "unzereh Kinder?" to which the other Rebbe responded "bei unz iz nit duh di prublem." That's when the Rebbe said "velecher kinder zeinen nit unzereh?!"

I don't know if this story is true, it may totally be made up, but the point is 100 percent true.

I think in general when we hear a tragedy R"l there a few steps that go through our subconscious. 1: is it my family G-D forbid? 2: someone i know? 3: my sect? 4: frum? 5:Jewish?

The higher the number the more it effect us? i don't think that necessarily means it does not bother and hurt us us when a Yid of any sort is the victim. it's just the closer they are to us the more we feel the effect.

I also feel (not to take away from the genuine and sincere pain we feel for our fellow), that there is an element of fear when we here a tragedy. (this is more in regards to a physical tragedy then spiritual), and the closer the victim is to us the more the fear, for obvious reasons.

Anonymous said...

To me the saddest part is that when they are frum there is the terrible machloikes such as Lubavitch/Satmar/Misnagdim fill in the blanks.....they can barely speak to each other, when they frei out they suddenly realize how much we frummeh yidden have in common:See the gevaldogeh achdus at the Chulent scene, kids from all kinds of frum backrounds getting along.Do we have to frei out to realize how important achdus is?

Hirshel Tzig - הירשל ציג said...

well, willy, as long as we preach division in our schools and Yeshivos this will be the result. We have ourselves to blame.

Anonymous said...

Frum yidden don't preach division. We are full of love for other Jews, even if they don't look like us.

I learned the above from reading Avi Shafran's articles in the Jerusalem Post On-line. Until then, I had laboured under the same misconceptions that you apparently have.

Anonymous said...

Lucky Wolf - The conversation you mention involved the current Belzer Rebbe (it's on tape), and as a result the Belzer opened a (very successful) yeshiva for baalei Teshuva.

Lucky Wolf said...

anon 1135,
i as well actually heard the story about the Belzer, since however i was not sure if the story was true, i did not want to mention any names.

But thanks for clarifying and confirming.